counting sheep

Sleeping.

I adore it! 


If you thought you were going to get a break from the poor-pitiful-me-posts, I'm sorry. Things just don't always go as planned. See, nice weather is here-and I thought that I'd work in the garden a few hours every day or so ~sure~ why not? Well, because it appears I just do not have the time...why not? I apparently need to maintain a scheduled two hour nap every day! What am I two? So, what le heck you ask? Well, believe me, I'm asking the same thing. If I am truly THIS tired - how in the world am I even operating on a day-to-day basis, right? I know!? For the love of goddesses, I'm realizing it's a miracle I'm up and walking about everyday what with my apparent lack of consciousness. This sudden narcoleptic business is rather suspicious on the heels of that sleep test I took a few months back~I was not born yesterday, I can figure these things out...my brain goes kinda mushy, my I'm not tired switch blows a fuse and even simple chores can blow my hair back!
 

So here is the deal y'all. I was scheduled for a sleep study. I arrived promptly and was shown to my private closet room. It had a decent bed, bedside stand, a television with remote and a private bathroom. so far so good. Then came my hook-up (tee-hee)... the hook up consists of a series of wires and belts and takes from 45 minutes to one hour to complete. Most of the wires attach to your head and scalp. There were about 25 leads attached all together. Those leads are picking up brain waves. From your brain waves, they can tell if you are awake or asleep and also the quality of your sleep. When you are asleep, the stage of sleep you are in can be determined. Also monitored are eye movement and muscle activity on you chin/jaw to see if you grind your teeth as well as helps to detect when you go into REM. Beneath your nose you will have a cannula to monitor when you breathe in and out, also a snore microphone on your neck to see if you snore (duh)! They can read every thought you have, okay, not really but you know, it's kinda scary that way!


At least two EKG patches will be on your chest to pick up your heart beat and two elastic bands will go around your chest and abdomen to sense your effort breathing. Not done yet! There are also leg leads attached to each shin to detect leg movements such as restless leg syndrome. FYI I have never had RLS until that moment! thanks sleep study tech, just what I wanted! So, last but not least is the Pulse/Ox attached to your finger complete with a little red light (hell-o ET)! that's it! ready for your close-up polysonmogram...

OH, did I mention someone will be watching you all night and listening to every little sound you make...okay, now, just relax and go to sleep. What? Right!
Still, I was so determined on acing my sleep test until a dreadful visit from you know who hit, I'm talking about you insomnia! All of a sudden I felt as lite up as an all night liquor store. The kicker is it happened during my test. I felt like a bunch of tiny caffeine monsters invaded my body. All I could think about was gooooooing to ssssssleeeeeep! and the more I thought about it the wider awake I was. Now, for anyone who knows me, insomnia is not something I suffer from, in fact quite the opposite, so for it to happen during my sleep study was rather bizarre.  definitely not cool.



The morning after the test, I went and got my hair done...yea, that's right! my hair done ( there was goop all over it and tangled enough to give Rapunzel a run for her money, yet my hairdresser never missed a beat...she is sweet that way!) After my hair appointment, I crash landed on the couch and passed le heck out.  Dude, I slept like a baby. like a log. gave Mr. VanWinkle a run for his money (where is a sleep tech when you need one?). I should have known something was going to happen, when I woke up I grabbed my i-pod and the puppies and went for a walk to clear my mind. I started bawling uncontrollably over a song that came on, I just was over come with emotion to the point of tears. Not my proudest moment. Certainly not my worst either but you understand, right? In consolation, I had waffles for dinner. yeah, got to love the mood swings.


I am not a wimp. I do not believe in coddling myself.
Get up, get out there, and just do what you need to do. I don't really even believe in taking medicine for a cold. I do however, believe in the restorative power of sleep. Be forewarned people, the following is not pretty...you may want to stop reading and skip down a bit...I did not sleep well that night and thereby also discovered the world of late-night television, including commercials for Erectile Dysfunction medications and discussions of Alien Abduction. Apparently, there's a lot of this going on between the hours of 1:00am and 4:00am. that I never knew anything about until suffering this bout of left-over creepiness from my sleep study that prevented me from getting my beauty rest and seriously threatened my naturally sunny disposition.


I counted sheep. I tossed. I turned...I turned on my computer. I updated things that didn't even need to be updated. I installed another browser. I stalked Amazon.com. I watched the seconds click by on the clock. This went on for hours. It was sooo irritating, but I could not stop it. I could not quit it. I pretended to befriend it, but still...I was consumed~haunted~tormented...

It wore me down.
I have a hair appointment today. Hopefully my hair dresser will be able to fix all my problems for me. snap me out of this. what really worries me is that I may be losing the ability to keep things in perspective...is it just a matter of time before I become the crazy cat lady. Have a wardrobe consisting only of red and purple. Am I destined to be the old woman on the cruise ship, the one crawling around under the table searching for her lost shrimp from the all-you-can-eat buffet, then wandering the Lido deck baggage in hand like Delta Dawn?
I've got to get my bangs cut, they have a lot of work to do.

update...I am once again gobbling up sleep like chocolate chip cookies from Grandma's bottomless cookie jar.  I know how good I have it, I really do...after all the insanity passed I did ace my sleep test and luckily, after a crazy few days, the bluebirds are once again landing on my shoulders, as I fling open the shutters and greet the day.

 chicken and broccoli (aka comfort food)
(go here for recipe)
 peace.

Comments

Popular Posts